Thorns

thorns

Something has been on my mind for quite some time. Keep popping in and out of my head, claiming attention more and more. I have been pondering on it even before, but always managed to send it to the deepest, darkest corner of my mind, only letting it out once in a while, once in a blue moon more like it.

Yes, the baby subject again.

Could it be because around me everyone is pregnant or wanting to get pregnant? How can it be possible that the supermarkets, the malls, the streets are full of expectant ladies? All I hear in the news that our population is aging, less and less children are born. Than where do they come from? From a different planet? Well, it is a well known fact that you see what you want to see… I guess in my case lots of babies. Since I have been sitting here having my coffee in a mall I’ve seen 10 babies, 3 pregnant women and 1 guy. No, he was not pregnant, just met a pregnant lady. Hmm…

Lately I’ve been talking to women wanting to have another baby. Here is what they’ve experienced.

To their surprise things don’t exactly go the way they thought would go. You would assume that if you already have a child or two than it is a straight forward business, a few nights with your hubby, a couple of glasses of bubbly and done. The next thing is smiling over the two lines on your pregnancy test followed by lots of time spent in the loo with a jar of pickles in your hand.

Well, not so.

The fact is that having children means absolutely no guarantee for future conception, especially if you’ve waited for quite some time.
All sorts of things could go wrong. First step is a visit to your gynaecologist, who will check your uterus and ovaries with an ultrasound examination.
Then comes the blood test to check your prolactin level, LH (luteinizing hormone) level, serum progesterone level, Estradiol and FSH (follicle-stimulating hormone) level.
If you are lucky, than all you need is some progesterone which you’ve seemed to have lost on the way.
If not, than you will also need to stimulate your eggs with something like Clostilbegyt or i’ts homeopathic equivalent .

Of course you have other options, that might increase your chances of conceiving. The list is endless: vitamin and mineral supplements, Aviva, various yoga positions, reflexology, staying away from extended use of iPads, iPhones, calling a psychic who will tell you whether you meant to have a baby or not, meditation, letting go of your fears and self imposed limitations during full moon…I can go on and on…

A friend is just about to give birth to her third child. At times I envy her so much, envy the feeling of tiny baby feet kicking from within, that pregnancy glow, the soon to be born baby’s incredible smell.

Ever wondered why do they smell so good?No bad breath, just pure milky, powdery scent of a newborn. Not a single fragrance house has been able to recreate it 100%.

Having more then one child means your first born will never be alone, he will learn to share, to love, to take care of someone smaller than him.
Having a pet might tick some of the boxes, but it is still not the same. Trust me, we know.
A baby means that you feel young again, get to hang out at the playgrounds, toddler groups, special yoga classes. You become approachable, you can easily strike up a conversation at almost any place about breast feeding, bowel habits and sleeping patterns.

You have a gorgeous looking baby everybody smiles at, you get to hug and cuddle.
And no guys, nothing beats that….cuddling with a big hairy man is not quite the same.

However that’s not all good.

The downside is that no more uninterrupted sleep for the next few years again, no wine or bubbly for quite some time.
A whole new wardrobe unless you are as determined as a super model to get back into shape, less time to spend with your partner, your child, more costs to endure ( one more child to dress, feed and school).
Gone are the lazy nights by the fire, or reading a book till midnight knowing that you don’t have to wake up early on a Saturday morning.
No more endless hours of pottering around the garden, safe in the knowledge that your child is big enough to raid the fridge if hunger strikes.
No more relaxing baths with music and candle light.
No more weekend trips to Rome, Paris or Amsterdam.

There is a saying “No rose without a thorn”.
We need those thorns to make us appreciate life even more.

Despite of everything I’ve just listed my sis is still trying to conceive.

And hundreds, thousands, millions of us.
We are willing to do just about anything for having a baby! The question is: Is it worth it??????
I leave it up to you to answer that question.

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